Racism and Reality

The whole shooting in Connecticut has brought to the forefront a lot of issues of racism, and how America still handles this subject.

When I was younger I use to think that as long as two people loved each other not much else mattered in this world, and as long as they had made up their minds to be together nothing else mattered, but time and maturity has shown me that there are a world and a wealth of other factors to consider.

I am a romantic, but I am also very practical. For anyone who has read my blog, they know that I like to think out all the angles in any situation.

Over the last year I have visited sites that focus on race, some who focus on the differences in a negative way, cause I wanted to learn what people think, how they view the issues. I have learnt a great deal.

Most people think of people who have race issues as uneducated hick types, backwards, unintelligent, but that is not always the case. A lot of the people who frequent such site, not all but some, are intelligent people, they hold their views at times not cause they are full of hate, as I might have thought at one point, but because they are found of their own race, and see separation as the answer. Then ofcourse there are those that just hate people of other races, they admit it, they are proud of it, and very little will likely change their minds. Just like in the real world you get a variety of opinions and views on the issue. What I found is that just like anyone else, most people on those forums, do not have the answers anymore than most.

The only thing that happens on those forums, is in my opinion is hat it allows many to be more open and honest than many of their counterparts. Many countries still have a lot of race and race issues to deal with, America as much or more than anyone else.

What really caught my eye about the shooting incident is the sudden and complete denial about any issues of race or racism. People might not like those forums where they discuss race, and issues of racism, and their open views, but in some ways at least they are more honest. I think if that workplace had been honest with themselves, they in another time period would have been more overt and told him that they just did not want to work with him.

People always talk about how times have changed, but sometimes when you look at the forum comments you realize that in some ways they have not changed as much as people would like to think.

Some places are going to be more fraught with issues of racism than others. I think the more diverse a city becomes, the better change you have of those issues being dealt with, simply because the numbers are more balanced. I think the location where the shooter worked, unfortunately was likely a good breeding ground for such issues to come to light, and being one or the only person of color in his environment, it was easy for the co-workers to use race as the determining factor of the targeting, but with mobbing, any factor can and is often used, but on most of the forums, they are highly focusing on the race issues involved.

Today's society makes it easier for people of different views, values, and backgrounds to interact, I personally think that's a good thing. I like the lessons that I have learnt from those around me, and would not trade that for anything. I know that there are others however in this world that do prefer to keep things separate, they just don't think that people should mix, and it's ok to have such views, and to be open and honest about them. Where it crosses the line and is not ok, is when you hate, or hurt others simply because of those differences, or put them through degrading situations, that is not ok, and that is where it crosses the line, and this is the view that most people hold of others who want separation.

I think focusing back on people and relationships, I would have to say, that depending on where you live, who your family, and friends, social circle are, and who you love, these factors might well in today's society come into play when deciding if you can make a situation work, or if it's even worth the risk to try.

Though I still think love is a pretty big determining factor for wither two people should be together, I also think if it's going to rip a family apart, or put you in a situation where you surround yourself with people that hate, or dislike you simply because of who you are, these are factors to consider. A lot of people in the world still have crazy, stereotypical views of others. America for some odd reason thought that the issues of race and racism were behind because of who was elected president, but as you can see in the last little while it has, only brought those issues closer to the surface. I personally think that is a good thing, because anything else is just deluding yourself and does not fix the problem.

Love in this world is important, in any realm, I do believe it is the most important and determining factor, but in this world it's not the only factor, so many other things have to be considered, and people should be realistic and honest with themselves. Can you really live with Aunt Susan and Uncle Chester cutting you off because of who you choose to be with? If you visit some of these forums, it's entire families threatening to cut people off if they date the wrong person. I think if you are in it for the long haul then great, but I think a lot of people do not understand what the long haul is, I think they are very naive about how hateful the world can truly be, and the objections that they might truly encounter on embarking on certain unions or associations, and it's well to give a lot of forethought in advance, to make sure you really understand what you are getting yourself, and other into.

People are still hung up on race, gender, sex, age and even class, the hang up's and objections are not as obvious, but they are still there. Some people can push ahead and cross those bridges when they come to them, but for others, every angle should be reviewed, and considered very carefully.

With the shooting that happened, sure race as an issue can not be ignored, but I hope people understand that the bigger issue was still workplace mobbing. If he had been white instead of black, there are a variety of reasons he still could have become a target, and object of workplace mobbing, and there are a variety of reasons that the workplace shooting could still have happened. If you look at past cases, he fits the profile of those who are targeted, and then finally lash out, but no matter how many stories are presented, I am still left watching society wringing their hands, going, oh how could this have happened, why would someone do this, he was just deranged, he shot random people. No he did not, he shot those he felt were the ones targeting him, and harassing him. He left those that had not been a problem for him, like the woman in the wheelchair. His girlfriend confirms as much, by saying she recognizes the names of those shot, and they were people he had previously mentioned as his harassers. We don't want to be mean to the targets of the shooting, by even hinting that they had any flaws, I understand that, but we will not prevent future tragedies, by sticking our heads in the sand and ignoring this issue, it's not going to go away, and I am sad each time that an incident like this happens, because it is a tragic wast of life, and if we paid attention to workplace mobbing, more of these issues could be prevented. Instead we have unions that can ignore targets of mobbing, and most mobbing target fear taking higher steps, cause it usually increases the mobbing, and puts them at deeper risk of losing their jobs, so they stay in these situations, most can not afford to quit, because they fear being able to pay the bills, and then it creates these toxic situations with these end results.

Only be dealing with these issues openly, directly, and responsibly can we hope to bring about changes.

For love sometimes it's worth it to risk it, you might just inspire others with your actions, but at other times, it creates scandal beyond ones wildest imaginations or expectations, and people have to understand this ahead of time, and determine if they can go the distance.