Paranoid

I thought it was time to tackle one of the labels that had been used in the article, What's Behind The Internet Conspiracy Empires? The community at times has been labeled as paranoid. I feel that the label in some instances can have merit, but for the most part is groundless and unfounded.

The idea is that Gang Stalking websites and even conspiracy websites run the risk of making someone that is already paranoid even more so. Well I thought about this and I decided it was best to review other materials that might render someone even more paranoid than they were before.

Let's start with Books, Movies, Music, and then the Internet.

First there were books, these dangerous things which became more prevalent with the advent of the Gutenberg printing press. The ideas in books at times have not only been considered dangerous, they have been considered revolutionary, and yes some books contain material that some would say has the ability to make others become paranoid. Let's look at some examples.
1. The Bible. This book teaches us that an invisible entity created the earth. Using energy much like you see in those star trek movies he created matter. That matter became the earth and everything therein. The old testament of the bible is the main and guiding force of the Jewish religion, Christian religion, and Islamic religion.

The bible teaches that other realms and other beings exist that are not visible to the naked eye, such as heaven and angels.

The bible teaches that if we have faith we took can create and change the course of things.
I often wonder how psychologist and psychiatrist would interpret these groups of people who believe this stuff if they were not protected by freedom of religion? Would they be persecuted and called paranoid? Would they be studied and probed wondering how such beliefs will affect the person who is already paranoid?

Eg. If someone believes that the world is evil, and being ruled by evil forces and evil influences, then starts reading the bible and it proves to them the existence of the devil and evil, should we then be worried about the influence that the bible is having on those that are already paranoid about evil in the world?

Yet the bible has been around for centuries and it's believes and those who gather around such beliefs have been around for an equally long time and we don't have these communities online or offline being probed about whither people reading the bible could become more paranoid.
I thought I would point out one of the many gathering places that this group hangs out.

http://www.bible-discussion.com/message-board-forum/

2. Movies.

That is number two on my list for things that could make people who are already paranoid even more paranoid.

We have seen the movies come over the years, the Exorcist, The Omen, Kerry, Constantine, Rosemary's Baby, Skeleton Key, just to name a few.

http://www.scene-stealers.com/top-10/top-10-scariest-movie-themes/

Most of these movies have themes where if someone had a belief or was already paranoid these movies could add to and enhance that belief. These movies unlike the Internet which requires you to read and interpret material, provide a visual and audio interpretation so that you don't even have to read or think about the material being presented. You don't have to use your imagination or anything, all the proof is right there in front of you. Therefore I wonder if psychologist and psychiatrists are out patrolling these movies, discussions around these movies, the websites, and books that have been spawned from the movies to see what effect they would have on someone who is already paranoid?

I think they might be discussing zombie and vampire movies here. You might want to keep an eye on these people. They are talking about the movie Twilight. Mind reading vampires? What's up with that? Better keep an eye on these paranoids, clearly watching and discussing these movies could be adding to paranoia about the undead walking around in society, and we don't know what will happen if they gather together. Better observe them.

http://allhorrormovies.com/

3. Radio and Music.

In the 80s people were told that if they listened to or let their children listen to Black Metal music, things like Black Sabbath or Ozzy Osbourne that it could cause violence, it was associated with black magic. If you played the music backwards, there were backwards lyrics. There was a real move at one time to ban some of these albums. Now if someone is paranoid and they go out listen to one of these albums or another and hear backwards messages which make them more paranoid, and go and discuss it with other groups of people who have heard the same things should we be worried?

Well I can tell you most of the 80's survived this trend, there were many young and older persons who tried this and discussed it, talked about what they thought they were hearing and survived, despite what some of the experts were saying about the evils of the music of that time period.

Black Metal is not the only music that has ever been considered to be dangerous or a concern, but it's the one that comes to mind.

4. Role Playing Games. Remember when these were bad for you? Well I do and so do some others.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dungeons_&_Dragons_controversies

[quote]At various times in its history, Dungeons & Dragons has received negative publicity for alleged promotion of such practices as devil worship, witchcraft, suicide, and murder. In the 1980s especially, some religious groups accused the game of encouraging interest in sorcery and demons.[1] Throughout the history of roleplaying games, many of these criticisms have been aimed specifically at Dungeons & Dragons, but touch on the genre of fantasy roleplaying games as a whole.[/quote]

Anyone remember this. We were told that the kids that got into this stuff would kill, commit suicide, or become paranoid. Today with so many different role playing games offline and online, this is no longer being parroted by concerned health professional, but there was a time where this game and others like it were a focus. It seems the more members that belong to an organization, the harder it is to demonize it and call it paranoid.

If someone is paranoid, then virtually any medium or method could add to that paranoia, picking up the phone, listening to the radio, watching T.V., or even just reading a book. These other mediums have been around long before the Internet has.

5. The Internet.

Conspiracy websites and Gang Stalking Websites. The most recent flavor of the month and the focus of concerned health professionals.

I will focus on the Gang Stalking websites. Primarily some Gang Stalking Websites, such as Gang Stalking World explain that a covert investigation is opened up on an individual. The person is then followed around using covert and overt methods. The person is followed out in public by foot patrols and vehicle patrols, that use various methods to communicate, including a one handed sign language. These patrols use covert human intelligence sources or Informants as part of the surveillance.

The individual complains that those around them seem to be aware of what is happening, and are taking part in the ongoing investigation.

The individual life is disrupted, by rumour and slander campaigns similar to what we saw in Cointelpro. Some complain of home break in's and various other forms of life disruptions.
Those are some of the basic elements of the Gang Stalking. They are not all the methods, or complaints but they are the primary ones.

In the case of the Gang Stalking community to label someone as paranoid without first investigating each case might be considered by some to be irresponsible and unprofessional, considering that much of what targets complain about have been parts of covert investigations in the past, and many of the methods complained about have been used previously in programs
such as Cointelpro and others.

Patterns that repeate.

I am going to use this analogy to talk about patterns that repeat themselves. At one of my old jobs we had these three people in a repeating pattern. Two were into the game and third was trying to leave the game.

It was a bit of a dating game. Guy was into girl number one, then started seeing girl number two on the side. Every time girl number one would try to leave the game, girl number 2 and the guy would have a noisy break up in the middle of the workplace, he would swear it was all over, girl number 2 would throw a fit in the middle of the job, then the guy would chase off any other guys and try to get girl number one pulled back into the game.

He didn't just do that however, he would come off looking like the wounded victim that was not being treated fairly, even going so far as to lie to about his continued involvement with girl number 2. Then once he had the game back on track, the game would start again, with girl number 2, then the noisy break up's. etc. The guy and girl number 2 seemed to get off on the game and the noisy break up's and getting back together, because it allowed them to parasitically feed on a third party. Much like our stalkers feed on us with their games, and yes I do think some of them do get off on it.

One of the things that Targets have to be careful with is patterns that repeat. There own patterns and those of the snitches.

I mean they do the same things over and over again so we should be able to get use to it, but we don't.

We also have to be careful to avoid our own patterns. Patterns are a thing that you have to be able to look for, recognise and find a way to break, or work around.

Eating patterns, they watch us in the grocery store to try to figure out what we are buying. This can be done for a few reasons. Several targets have complained about specific items they buy being out of stock every time. They can use this to figure out our diet. If we move they can find us that way as well.

Shopping patterns. Go to a store too much and ever notice that suddenly a new face is there? I don't want to give too many details, but it's something to be aware of, especially with food places. If the normal store keeper will not report your eating habits or tamper with your food, the new face just might.

Also your shopping routes. They know where you go, so if you go missing they start to look for you on the old familiar routes. They have them mapped and they will report it to the foot soldiers.

This is why targets sometimes complain about things like, it was all set up before I got there, it's like they knew I was going to be there. If you have been there before that could be why, or it could be you were discussing it on the phone, or worst case scenario, you were thinking it.
Sleeping, bathroom, sexual, dating, Internet, workplace, etc. We have patterns and one of the things that these people try to do is to learn them. We are creatures of habit and we have to try to break away form those patterns when we can.

They have patterns also, if we learn some of these, we can deal with them better. I spent a lot of time watching them early on, trying to figure out some of the ways that they functioned, ticked, worked, etc.

Learning as much as you can about the one handed sign language would be a good start. Second if you have a sensitivity, what is the pattern they are using for trying to keep you sensitised? Eg. They used my sensitivity for over 8 years in and out of the workplace.

What are the patterns they are using to set you up? Themes that they are trying to throw your way, eg, Mark M. Rich said he thought they were trying to set him up to make him look like a rapist at one point.

What are the harassment patterns, sleep deprivation, street theatre, electronic harassment, online stalking?

Looking for patterns helps us to know what to expect, they are pretty predictable, and it helps us to be better prepared in knowing what to expect.

Since this thing started, I am so disappointed to know just how pattern filled I am in some ways, and what a creature of habit I am in others. I have had to learn my own patterns, and try to change some, modify others, and just get new ones from time to time.

I have had to learn theirs, so now I can know, ok it's going to be one of those days, expect cars to be lunging at you, people trying to bump into you, etc. Or expect extra electronic harassment tonight, etc. Kind of like trying or learning to predict the weather.

Another pattern that they now have is that in the area where I am, they use these headphone kids, on the trains. I am trying to figure this one out.

Now everyone has ipods and stuff, but what we have here is people 20-30's and they are always on the subway, one guards each door, it's not just random, these people have ipods and at times it appears that they are listening for something, other than the music. My best guess is the announcements of stops.

I know when I use to carry my laptop, it would announce the train station that I was at, and I know it could be heard somehow, thus I stopped carrying the laptop. I know the train stops were being heard via my laptop because at a previous job, when we had a meeting, my laptop in the middle of the meeting while turned off, started announcing stuff. I took the battery off, and there you could still hear the train stops being announced. I was about 20 floors up, and it was not the stop near where I was.

I never hear the laptop externally do this again, but I have strong reason to believe that it was being used in this capacity for this reason. Picture this. You are a head phone kid, you are on the same train as the target, the targets electronic device picks up the sound of the stop being read out, eg. "redwood, we are approaching redwood station." They hear this over their ipods, or other headphone devices, meaning that they are on the correct train with the target. The ones who do not, know that the target is not on the same train, and so therefore bugger off. Very cleaver and oh so illegal, but when has that ever stopped the government from allowing the snitches to do this sort of stuff, nice democratic country.

Try to remember that electronics can be used to track locations, and anything that has a microphone, can be used to listen in to conversations. http://www.gangstalkingworld.com/Social/article.php?sid=2

What I don't get yet, is how ipods and things like that can be used to listen to something like a specific station being announced? What frequency would they tune into?

Recently I had some luck in being alone without the above mentioned scenario, and it was pretty different. For a good 30 minutes they did not know for certain where I was, and I noticed that I did not see the headphone kids, as I have nicknamed them. In fact the experience was so different it's hard to explain.

This again brings me back to snitches and trying to manipulate the targets sense of reality and perception. Because what a target experiences day by day is so all encompassing, it could be as bad as we think, but it might also not be as bad as we think. What I mean is, the few times I have slipped away, I have noticed openings, in how things are laid out. Point being if they know where the target is going to be, they have time to set things up, and to make it seem complete and all encompassing.

Spotters, you have to be careful with these, these are in all the old familiar places, if you do elude the snitches for a time, you have to be careful to avoid places that are familiar, because familiar locations have spotters who recognise the targets and can easily snitch you out.

There is a lot more to say, but some of it, I have to hold onto. The point is however, be cognizant of patterns, they have a tendency to repeat, your own and those of others. You can not not break the pattern of others, all you can do is be aware of them, find a work around.

Your own patterns you can control, and those you have to try to change if you are going to survive being Targeted Individuals. They had to change how meetings were conducted due to Cointelpro Infiltrations and we are no different.

http://gangstalkingworld.com/Forum/YaBB.pl?num=1174082279

The last thing I wanted to point out, yesterday after posting about how I can't get on the Internet without the snitches, I noticed a change the next time I logged on. It seems that there is a wireless override which allows them to log onto my computer anytime they wish, which I can see, but it also appears that some sites that I am accessing might not be what they appear to be.
In some cases it might almost be like I am accessing an intranet, vs an Internet, but since I have no definitive proof of this yet and just a suspicion, my observation continues. However this is something you might want to be cognizant of.

Anyways patters repeat if we start to look for them, we can change them, manipulate them, and hopefully even free ourselves from them, or at least be on our guard for them. We have patterns and they do too, learn theirs and your own, then use it against them, or at least use it to protect yourself from them. Many of them are parasitic, they do get off on what they do to targets, and they like the game that is being played, where many of us just want to get out.

Don't play the game.

The last year and a half has taught me many things about being a target offline and online.
Finding out that the world is nothing like what you grew up believing it to be has been a real eye opener. Democracy is an illusion. Democratic countries use covert war tactics to keep the domestic populations in line. These tactics range in brutality and there ability to simply disable a threat to outright elimination.

These tactics are nothing new and have been a part of the system since the system was in place. Be it using Red Squads on new immigrant populations to infiltrate, or to destroying certain unruly elements. Civilian Informants have always been around, and I am guessing that they always will that's the disturbing part. Each unruly element then becomes integrated into this system. Some countries rule as outright dictatorships, their brutality is obvious and overt, other countries are not so obvious. They enslave their populations and control them in other ways. They use the citizens of the state to be the eyes and ears of the state. They use the citizens to control their unruly elements, to infiltrate, betray and destroy.

Anonymity. When I first came online, and finally found out about Gang Stalking, I tried to make contact with many of the Gang Stalking Groups. I have always been fairly anonymous online and that remained. The first thing I noticed about many of these individuals is that they wanted to know who I was, where I was from, my full name, etc. Most of this information was never provided. What they used to try to garner this information was a guilt trip. How can we trust you if we don't know who you are? We have lot's of perps trying to infiltrate us, if we don't know who you are how can we trust you? We have nothing to hide, what are you trying to hide. These arguments in some degrees made sense, but what I would later discover is that these people would try to use city, and any other information to figure out who you were as a target, and then if you had a sensitivity they would try to use that as they further tried to psychologically put you off.

I believe if you are a target, you never have to share your identity with anyone. If you are going to be doing activism offline, this changes ofcourse, but offline you can be as open or as anonymous as you choose to be, and don't let anyone tell you differently. A real target has plenty to hide, as far as safety is concerned offline and online. That is not to say that we should be hiding, but each target must decide their degree of comfort with revealing details about themselves.

The other thing I discovered online is that depending on what people thought my gender was, the early conversations and discussions changed. When I first came online, I still did not know a lot about Gang Stalking, that's an understatement. I knew nothing about Cointelpro, had never heard of Red Squads, etc. What I did know, I tried to use in discussions and on forums with others to try to bring awareness about what was happening, in the hopes of getting this stopped. At the time I still believed that we were looking at something that was easily manageable via education and awareness.

I found that on forums if people thought that I was male and I was holding my own or winning via a debate on Gang Stalking, the persons that I was debating with would then go for personal attacks, these personal attacks usually tried to focus on maybe I was some sort of pervert, a pedophile or even sexual harasser of some kind. If you can't win the debate then attack the person you are debating with, or their character. I found on other forums it was the same, if assumed I was male/female and the discussions were going in my favor, the personal insults would change based on the gender that they thought I was at the time, or gender I said I was at the time.

I find that on forums where I am perceived to be female, if I am around people who choose to use personal attacks, or character assassinations they tend to be more gender based, I find that you get a great deal of sexually explicit comments, or things that try to assassinate your character making you seem slanderous, almost deserving of the treatment. I also find that on forums where I am perceived to be female vs male, the personal attacks also quickly go towards, mental competency more quickly.

I find that on forums where I am perceived to be male, that if personal attacks are to be used they still center around trying to make it look as if you are some sort of pervert, character assassination of mental competency is also used, but not as readily in debates. These are some of the differences that I have discovered along the way.

Ofcourse online you can be just about anything you want to be. On one of my favorite forums I discovered I am a pixel on a screen. Neither male, more female, neither Asian, European, African, Spanish, neither gay nor straight, just a pixel on a screen. The interesting thing about the online world is you can literally be anything, and anyone you choose to be. I find that in the last year and a half, I have learnt a lot about how people treat you depending on the perception that you choose to let them believe, or give them about yourself. In reality online you really are nothing more than a pixel on a screen if you choose to be.

That is not to say that you still do not have to be careful with character assassinations, or critical personal attacks. You will find online, just as offline, the idea is to same, ruin the targets credibility where you can. Paint the target to be someone or something undesirable, someone deserving of their treatment and targeting. Offline this can put you in physical danger, and online this can put you in danger of a different sort. I think on online we still have to be very cognisant of this fact if we are going to be posting on forums and trying to bring awareness to the things that Targeted Individuals go through.

The nice thing about being online is I can honestly say that I like about 99% of the people that I have met and interacted with. Early I had a few negative run in's. Also I had threads deleted, when I did win debates or was able to trap Perps as I was calling them at the time, into slipping up. Eg. I once had a Civilian Spy pm me, with personal info about a website that I ran, that they could not have known about because the website had not been made public. The pm's were deleted in a matter of seconds of me pointing this out. I did save a copy however of at least one pm, but things like this were common in the initial months. Since then my online interactions have been extremely positive. Then there is that 1% of the online population that I have to remember my own rule with. Just don't play the game. There is one popular forum that I find the majority of people are pretty decent to associate with, and then there are specific elements that still after a year and a half, are deeply intent on slander, and character assassinations. This would not be a problem, except a lot has changed within the last year and a half. As cute as these were a year a half ago, they are no longer cute. They certainly do not further the cause of Gang Stalking, and in fact serve to ruin what some have worked hard for. Ofcourse that is the idea, realising that, I do try to remember my own rule and just don't play that game. This at times will mean just walking away.

I have had to learn to do this offline, so I am pretty well versed on this. I have had Civilian Spies, try to provoke me, and set me up in a variety of ways. Even before I knew what Gang Stalking was, I realised that sometimes you just have to walk away. There are times in the past that I have been tempted or provoked to physically removing the provocation from my path, I don't regret any of those times, or actions that I have taken, but looking back and knowing what I know now. I can see that these people were being used to set me up so that who ever was observing me, would be able to say, yes it was an unprovoked reaction to something innoculate, or unprovoked, when in reality you are consistently being provoked, and people are consistently observing, looking for just a reaction. The same is true online, finding out what makes the target tick.

A year and a half ago I think I was more willing to play the game and put up with character assassinations, insults, slander, because nothing was as important as getting information out about Gang Stalking. A year and a half later however, things are different. The research that I have done has taken endless days, evenings, weekends, it's consumed most of my free time. The phone calls to lawyers, police, advocates, other institutions, private investigators, community workers, etc, the semi-undercover interactions with the Suburban Spies, has taken a lot of time. I have put most in not all of my free time over the last year and a half into finding out what is really behind Gang Stalking. As we can see, character assassination online can be just as dangerous and damaging as they can be offline. We know that in Korea, China, cyber violence is so prevalent that 1 in 10 of the population is affected by this. This is similar to online mobbing, but it often escalates to offline community harassment. In the last few days I have had to relearn a lesson that I thought I already knew, and that is to just not play the game.

I like 99% of the people that I interact with online, then there is that 1% element who do nothing, but try to destroy people's reputations with slander and character assassinations. At those times you just have to remember to not play the game. You also have to remember that it does not help the cause that you are fighting for, in fact you put yourself at risk of doing just the opposite, and if you care about what you are doing at all, then at those times you just have to remember to just walk away and just don't play the game. As a Targeted Individual it does come with the territory and just like offline it's good to be cognizant of this, and govern yourself accordingly, when possible. I know we are all human and it's easy to fall into this trap, but avoid it when you can.

Going forward, can we ever really hope to change what is happening in society? Democratic countries do the same if not worst than what other countries do. Much of the populous in democratic countries are complacent with and to a degree or aware of what is happening. Much of the populous in democratic countries in someway shape of form are aware of, and are parts of the system and are fully aware and going along with what is happening to some degree. These types of behaviors are not new or uncommon, and this is how the state commonly deals with dissidence. The only thing is most of us think of dissidence as marching at rallies, and being outspoken at marches. Most do not think of dissidence as whistle-blowing, writing and unpopular news article, or standing up for yourself at work against a big corporation, unfortunately the people that rule this world see it quite differently. Controlling dissidence means preventing the rise of another Messiah that could electrify the masses. It means identifying these elements early, in all their variations and dealing with them accordingly.

The last year for me has meant joining in, but staying separate. Over the last year I started with a website that was 100% open to the public, to a website that is open for reading and forwarding information only. I think had I left the format open the way I had initially intended I would have been distracted from my research. The elements that usually join these forums are not there for anything constructive, real targets are often lost in the cross fire, and it does not help. I find for me, researching on my own has been the most effective thing that I could do. I also find that if you visit some forums, you can look back a year and a half ago and realise that they are the exact place that they were. Nothing ever changes and no progress is ever made, and it's intended to be just like that. The same with many offline movements. You are meant to feel like things are progressing, but much like the forums, things don't really change that much.

Though I am doing what I can, life is still a struggle at time. I try to remember that you can not let yourself get isolated, you do have to try to keep in touch with some people, keep people updated on what is happening. Activism does help. I find that if I was not doing what I am doing, things would be 20 times worst. Being aware of what to expect saved me from getting sensitised to other things. Eg. When the electronic harassment first started, they would burn me almost 24/7 in my home, and try to sensitize me to loud power tools, drilling. Being aware that this possibility existed, I was able to psychologically not let myself get attached and not form a negative association. This really helped a great deal just being aware, and I was able to avoid that trap.

Offline some people are scared. The ones that do realise what this system is do not want to go against it. They will not discuss this in many instances. More people in society are Citizen Informants than I could ever dream of even imagine. People close to me, co-workers, stores that I enter. We probably have as high, or higher percentage of Citizen Informants in the city where I am, than East Germany did. Which is pretty messed up for a democratic country.
I read a report yesterday from someone who has travelled to many European countries, he reports that some countries are worst than others. So again the concentration of Civilian Informants will probably differ depending on where you are, what I am seeing and witnessing here is large scale.

Going forward what is the best approach? Some people think that open revolution is the best approach. I think that revolution starts in the mind. People who are controlled and attached to a system of conformity would be better freeing their minds first, before anything else. Once the mind is free then anything else is possible. I think if you have a revolution and have the same mentality you had before this all began, then you will be right back where you started from. I remember recently reading about a slave that had just been recently freed from the still thriving slave industry. This slave was freed physically, but he could not conceptualise freedom, and so he stayed with his master, and eventually agreed to become a bondsman again. It's like the baby elephant. You restrain a baby elephant with a really strong restraint, it tries to pull and pull and get free, eventually it learns that it can not, be free by tugging on the restraint. Eventually it stops trying and then you can restrain a 1000+ pound elephant with a restraint that can not really hold it in most cases, because it's mind has been bound. Free your mind and the rest will follow is how the saying goes. I think that is true in a lot of cases. From what I am seeing, people offline are still just comfortable enough. Some do realise what is happening, but if they are not being whipped physically, many will not risk rocking the boat. Why should they, they would loose out on the MTV, Myspace, what is the celebrity of the week is doing. You know the things that really matter in this world.

A year and a half later, I am more aware of the situation than I have been before. I have come closer to a place of acceptance than I have been before, but I am still a long way off. The problem is more encompassing than I realised, but that still does not mean that there can not be a solution, however part of that acceptance is realising that the world has always been like this, and is likely to continue to be like this, unless some cataclysmic force intervenes, or human society raises their consciousness to a higher degree.

At this time I see a world slowly in some ways, but in others rapidly moving towards a one world government, a global society, where the population are educated, think, and act the same way, with every-one's loyalty being to the State, and not to each other, not like we have known it in the formerly traditional ways of the world. People are comfortable with this brave new world that they live in. They like the advantages that it affords them. It does not require a high degree of morality, in fact it requires just the opposite of that. It does not require, bravery, chivalry, loyalty, honesty, in fact the opposite works best. In does not ask for faithfulness to anything but the state, you can not trust anything or anyone in most cases. Like attracts like. People are comfortable being around their own kind. If the people running the world are of the immoral or the corrupt then they will advance their own kind, and that is what you will find at the helms of institutions, and other centers of power, all the way up and down the line.

We are not the first societies to ever deal with these happenings, we will not be the last. The power is with the people. There will always be more of us than there are of them. If we remained loyal and true to each other then yes we could have the potential to defeat this system, but this system knows that and has us all in constant states of fear, mistrust, and disloyalty. 1984 has come upon us in subtle ways. It's not just about staying alive, but staying human, and yet many of us will betray each other the same way the characters betrayed each other in the book. The State counts on this one true aspect of human nature.

Is there really any hope? There is always hope, that is one thing that is so good about human nature. There is always hope, even in the deepest darkness, the worst fathomless pit there is always hope. I find that the targets I meet, many of them have a profound faith in God, or a higher power, or something outside of themselves. I wonder if that does not go a long way sometimes toward being singled out. The highly moral, the ones that can not be easily corrupted, conformed, or controlled. You probably fit a personality type that you are probably not even aware of. It's a blessing and a curse, but it's probably a large part of what brought you here. I don't always like the situation that I am in, but I know that if I have a choice to be on this side of the fence then this is where I would choose to be. I don't like being burnt in my home, I don't like the things that come with my targeting, the tactics that are being used to destroy my life, even the knowledge that the ultimate goal of this is to destroy me, but I would rather be on this side of the fence, than the side of the fence that could torture innocent children while they sleep in their home. That could harass men and woman and torture them in their homes. That could destroy women and men and ruin their reputations and lives. That could send innocent people to their deaths via suicide. That could see innocent people falsely institutionalised. That could cause innocent people to snap and mass kill others. I don't always like this side of the fence, but I know it has to be better than the other side of the fence. So I carry on. I know that it doesn't seem pleasant now, but I know this has built character, it's helped me to become more of the person I was always going to be, always wanted to be. As strange as this sounds, the events of the last year and a half, have helped me on my path to becoming who I was meant to be. This journey though unplanned to my conscious mind, was probably always going to happen in one capacity or another.

This time has been unpleasant, painful (electronic torture is just not what it use to be), psychologically testing, but it's helped me to be stronger on so many levels. It's challenged me, almost daily. I realise just how useless hate is. It's a wasteful emotion and it does not accomplish what needs to be accomplished. For me I read the bible a lot when I was younger, but it's really given me a lot of perspective as far as many of the lessons, psalms or proverbs. I see that others have been though similar experiences, where is seemed like the world had become evil, and my faith keeps me going, as I am sure it does many other targets. I now have a better understanding of Nazi Germany and how people can turn on each other and betray each other. It comes on so slowly you almost don't see it coming, but by the grace of God, or whatever power out there that like's me, I was one of the lucky ones. I do consider myself to be lucky, because I spent so many years not knowing what was happening, knowing something was not right, and just before this could fully consume me, I was able to find out what this thing was, well to a certain degree. That does not mean that it's made this evil time any better in anyway, but having an understanding is like a weapon unto itself.

I am grateful for this and when I look at the alternatives, or the targets that never got the chance to realise the evil that was upon them till it was too late, i do consider myself lucky. I might not win, but I at least have a fighting chance, many others did not. I also have the opportunity of helping others. I don't have to sit back and passively take what is happening to me. I can share what I am going through, I can make the path easier for others who are going through the same thing. This is something that I can do and am happy to do it. This as most targets know is one of the most productive things we can do. Any sort of activism really helps you find your center and is a good source of strength.

Looking forward, I am hearing about targets that have been going through this for 10 years, 20 years, etc. Targets of Cointelpro have been hunted down since the 70's and just because the government said that Cointelpro had ended the populas believed them. There are many targets of Cointelpro still in jail, murdered by the state. There organisations destroyed, personal lives disrupted and ruined. That is how the state then and now deals with dissidence, but even though the world is aware of this, and has seen this, it has not stopped this. People still hold onto the belief that if they just stay within the lines, nothing like this could ever happen to them. That is a mistake, but most people will not believe it unless it happens to them, and even then most would rather not believe the truth.

Going forwad what we can do is hope to light our own individual candles, and share that light with others, if enough lights shine forth in this darkness at the same time, then maybe we can bring about a change, at the very least we will be able to provide each other with some comfort within this darkness that has come over us again in this time.

Spy Games

Just in case you missed it, I am being followed around the city and being spied on in unspeakable ways.

I have for fun decided to do a couple of things with my little uncoordinated and at times directionally challenged spy force.

I can't list all the games here, cause that would ruin my fun, but I can list a couple.
Oh and before I do that, I should hand out the worst spy of the year awards.
The masticating of the eyes. Can we please train the spy force a little bit better on this. Some do it really really well, but others are just so bad at it I really want to pull them aside and give them retraining. Did they really have training or did someone pull them aside and then say hey this is how you do this this and that, and then throw them out there, because that really seems to be the case with some of these people.

Again why my assets have been of interest for the last several years I have no idea, but that does not mean we can not play games with them none the less.
1. Spies love to go for a walk, just like dogs or other animals they do not like to stay couped up in the house too much and so you really need to take them for a walk. One day when you have time, and you really want to see how challenged they are, take your suburban spies out for a walk.

I usually will once a month, yes unlike dogs, you don't have to walk them twice a day, they are much easier to maintain that way. So anyways, I usually will take mine for a walk from one end of the city to the next. We will stop to see the sites, I will make several stops to help them regroup themselves. Since they at times can be slow moving, and they will at times throw in an elderly person, so to be fair, I will make several stops.
But I take them all over the place. We go on walks and all sorts of things. It's fun they love it, it give them a chance to work off some of those spy pounds they have acquired the whole time, sitting on their assess waiting for their spy phones, pages and other tech devices to let them know what to do.
So if you are a target, be nice think twice and take your targets out for a walk.

2. Freak out a spy today. Now because spies are overly psychotic and a little neurotic, oh wait that should say a lot neurotic, then it's pretty easy to freak them out and watch the expressions on their faces. Now don't do anything too outrageous. Eg. For fun however I just recently told M. the spy assigned to sit beside me at work that a huge explosion happened right outside the window where he was sitting in the sky, while his back was turned on the half an hour call that he took. Now aside from the earth shaking blast, the windows shattering, the debris, the fire trucks, the sonic rumblings, which you think he would have noticed this right, and realise that I was obviously joking and trying to freak him out? Apparently not. So after watching the end of the world look on his face, I had to seriously roll my eyes and recant what I had said. It's nice to have fun with them, it's not nice to mentally scar them, (least not much.) Perps are people too. Sure they don't think that we are people, but that does not mean that we have to sink to their level.

I think that M. is taking his spy job pretty seriously. I think M. might have been a target at one stage, and is now a perp. Sad but true. This is what happens to you if you succumb to the evil empire. They will use you to hurt other targets. Anyways, so yes, games that mess with their mental acumen, or lack their of is ok, but let's try not to push it too far.
There are other games that can be played with the spy force, but that is just a couple. If you are a target or you know someone who is, then write in and tell me about your favorite games to play with targets to keep them on their toes and to keep other targets amused while we try to get through these trying times.